The Wellness Challenge

Heath

Health is here. Something we have been waiting for-for some time. Let’s just say, right before she was born was when I got hit hard with my epilepsy out of control. So many medical conditions this beautiful, now 9-year-old observed and learned about quick.

I know she was born with an amazing, kind, loving heart. But having a mom whom she loves so dearly, that is facing more than one illness and side effects of them everyday, her heart opened up in love for me as her mom, and as a protector of me that “understood.” She knew the days that were really tough, and she’d double ask on others to see if it was a day that we could play or go to the park down the street. She is also one that either was born with carefulness, or is something she drew in, during my illness, and strife of my ex husband attempting to be a far away dad-later in her life. She was very cautious. Not with just streets or heights. She just is cautious with about everything-and keeps her eyes on me–her mom. She would overlook more days than I ever knew, checking to see how she thought I might feel. Praying I was ok! She was always one remarkable child-well behaved, so loving. Yet, I do feel a lot was fear of losing me in one of my brain-surgeries.

She was so excited for this last brain surgery. Part was yes, very scared. But she had seen me go thru 2 brain resections. She felt inside, perhaps this one would get my mom better, more and more everyday-so we can do more and more that we love. And she was such a doll thru all the surgery and after. Yet I had to realize over the past year, while so sick, things had been altered much more than she and I were ever used to. We actually had quite some time in life when it was just she and I, in all circumstances, in our one bedroom apartment. I then saw how much dad was taking on, and even herself.

So we had planned to go to the mall-just she and I. And when I came all dressed, ready to get her-she was shocked! Didn’t know if I would really feel well enough, yet. As well as this field trip. She was afraid to ask me at first. But then I got a letter from the teacher asking. She was excited when I said of course I’d go. But the night before-she was talking about the trip in the tense as if it was just her going, not me. I asked her if she didn’t want me to. She turned to tell me–YES, OF COURSE. But she didn’t want to hurt my head or cause a seizure. My little heart just melted she takes so much on in that beautiful, young, CHILD-LIKE brain…. GO BE YOUNG!!! Let me tell you what is going on, but wow… I do thank you for such a heart, Tory.

That part of her reminds me of myself when I was little. I loved my mommy so much. It was all about her. But it isn’t. She needs to live, and be happy I am well– thank God for everyday we have. I have “missed” a lot that normal, healthy moms feel and do-for years. But we also have quite the bond and story for life. No regrets. Just a lot of adjusting to something so good in life!

I love my Tory so much… hug your kids. Her 9th birthday was the first one I was completely well for!! WOW!

Blessings!

Heather Siebens

@AliveinMe  @EpilepsyCures

HAPPINESS